“Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.”
Topic
marriage
940 quotes
Voices on marriage
“When marrying, ask yourself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this person into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory.”
More on marriage
“It destroys one's nerves to be amiable every day to the same human being.”
“We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.”
“Quarrels often arise in marriages when the bridal gifts are excessive.”
“Marriage is the most natural state of man, and... the state in which you will find solid happiness.”
“In marriage do thou be wise: prefer the person before money, virtue before beauty, the mind before the body then thou hast a wife, a friend, a companion, a second self.”
“Marriage is good enough for the lower classes: they have facilities for desertion that are denied to us.”
“Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel.”
“Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.”
“It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.”
“Well married, a person has wings; poorly married, shackles.”
“How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.”
“Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of opportunity.”
“There is no subject on which more dangerous nonsense is talked and thought than marriage.”
“Divorce is probably of nearly the same date as marriage. I believe, however, that marriage is some weeks the more ancient.”
“If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.”
“If I get married, I want to be very married.”
“Marriage is about the most expensive way for the average man to get laundry done.”
“Friendship is the marriage of the soul, and this marriage is liable to divorce.”
“Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution?”
“No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman.”
“Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.”
“There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage.”
“Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband a month before she marries him and what she thinks of him a year afterward, and you will have the truth about him.”